Sunday, April 10, 2005
you got a problem with me
on the train
looking out the doorscreen
i saw nothing but darkness
nothing but shadows
my past memories suddenly flooded me
i was taken-aback
tears began to blur my vision
broke down once again
my rejections
my failures
my fears
my hates
sometimes they reminds me
of how i'm still feeling lonely
and no one sees
no one
the feeling of being left out
loneliness
the feeling of being insignificant
loneliness
emptiness fills
nothingness covers
darkness falls
i'm lost
being lonely
has always been my phobia
how idiotic can that be
i also wonder why
people whom were once close to me
now they seemed so far, out of reach
have i been chucked aside, forgotten
just like the old toys
friends have always been important to me
now
haha forget it
the ship has sunk
i realised
no one seems to understand me
people always tell me i don't take initiative
people always tell me i will never have friendships that last
people always tell me that my attitude sucks
but do you even know me
no
you don't
i don't even know myself
how would you even know me
people jugde people from what they see
people judge people from what they hear
but not everyone looks good
not everyone is good with words
i admit i'm not pretty
i admit i do have a sulky face when i don't smile
i admit i'm not really good with my words
i admit i'm not good at anything
i don't even know what i want in life
i don't even know what is my interest
i don't even know what i'm good at
i don't even know what's going on
but what's wrong with that
what's important lies in the heart
how does the heart feel
what does the heart says
but has anyone tries to hear my heartbeat
no
ech0-blem
LyDiA[Sunday, April 10, 2005]
[___nO oNe oWns U, BuT me___]]**