..AbSoLute bLiss..

JUDGE NOT THE LORD BY FEEBLE SENSE
BUT TRUST HIM FOR HIS GRACE
BEHIND A FROWNING PROVIDENCE
HE HIDES A SMILING FACE

TO HAVE THE POWER TO FORGIVE
IS EMPIRE AND PREROGATIVE
AND 'TIS IN CROWNS A NOBLER GEM
TO GRANT A PARDON THAN CONDEMN

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copyright of kegan

UNFORGoTTEN MEMORIES
February 2005
March 2005
April 2005
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
November 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
May 2006
June 2006

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

should i???

thankz guys for the encouragement given
lurvee ya people so much
thank God for you people in my life
cos my results aint really good
and that has added on to my stress level
but anyway
i know God is with me
and i believe that He's my pillar of strength
but i'm still messe up
should i continue or should i not

ever since last year
my results haven't been very good
it's always at the bottom or super borderline
i'm really wondering if i should take my "A" levels this year
my dad has once told me to drop the idea of retaining
he said it's gonna affect my future
i know it's true
cos eventually, i'll be competing with students born in the year of dragon
which is so much more
which means that my competition with them
to get into university would be very high too
but putting that aside
what if i ain't able to do well for my A's?
it'll both a waste of time and money
the total costs of this exam is 400 plus
it's not cheap

now i really dunno what to do
i did study
maybe the wrong way
but i still did
that was why i felt discouraged
study still fail
back in secondary school
there's no problem with my study method
but when i'm in JC
everything seems so different
the teachers' teaching styles
the school's style
everything is different

right from the start
it's been a wrong choice made by me
my aggregate in secondary school have never been below 20 before
it was only during O-levels that my results are below 20
but it's only by abit
i got 18
which wasn't very good compared to those who are in JC
teachers always compare people with points
but i dont think that should be the case
know why
let me tell ya

two student
same results of 18 points
but look closely at the individual results

student A
English-C6
Maths-A1
Chinese-A1
Pure Physics-A2
Pure Chemistry-A2
Combine Humanity-C6

student B (me)
English-C5
Maths-A1
A-Maths-B3
Combine Science-B3
Combine Humanity-B3
Chinese-B3

see the difference
student A may be bad in arts(combine humanity),
but he scored in science
in JC there's only science and arts course
or commerce in MI
i'm average in all
and my science aint even pure
it's ridiculous isn't it

i did ask my secondary school teacher for opinions of what i should do
she even told me that i shouldn't go to a JC with my results
kinda true
i'm having difficulty coping now
someone help
i wanna study
but how???

ech0-lost

God...
Where are You
I need You by my side
Please hold me close to You

please.. ple..
i..i.. rea...lly.. du...n..no.. wh..at.. t..t..to.. d...do..

LyDiA[Wednesday, March 30, 2005]

[___nO oNe oWns U, BuT me___]]**
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